


All of me

by ChristinMKay



Series: If music if is the food of love, play on [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Co-workers, Comforting Castiel, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dean Has Self-Esteem Issues, Fluff and Angst, Homophobic John Winchester, Hurt Dean, Lazy Mornings, M/M, Praise Kink, Singing, Winter, castiel worships dean's body
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-10
Updated: 2014-12-10
Packaged: 2018-02-28 22:42:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2749802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChristinMKay/pseuds/ChristinMKay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cause all of me<br/>Loves all of you<br/>Love your curves and all your edges<br/>All your perfect imperfections - John Legend</p><p>The last week has been really bad for Dean. Stress at work and a phone call from his homophobic father makes him feel like shit, no wonder he wants to hide in his bed. But maybe Cas will manage to cheer him up a bit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All of me

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a dyslexic and not a native speaker so I'm sorry for any spelling/grammar mistakes.  
> I hope you enjoy reading it, leave kudos or a comment if you did :)

  
It's a cold but sunny saturday, the sky is shining in it's brightest blue and the snow reflects the sun beautifully. It looks like the weather is trying to make an apology for the last week, which has been grey, rainy and even colder than now.  
But Castiel can't really complain about the cold because Dean is snuggled against his chest, keeping him warm.  
Usually Dean wakes up before him, makes breakfast and the smell of bacon, coffee and Dean singing off key is the reason Cas is able to get out of bed. Normally Cas is not a morning person, not before he has at least drunken two cups of coffee and muttered something about how horrible the day will be.  
But not today. Today Cas woke up before Dean and right now enjoys the look of Dean curled up in his side, looking so peaceful and happy, Cas just has to sigh and presses a small kiss on Dean's forehead.

  
It's not really surprising that Dean is still sleeping today, not after the week he had. Not only had the weather been bad but their boss hadn't been happy with Dean's interview, their coworker and good friend Charlie had been mad at them because they had seen the new hobbit movie without her and also Dean's dad had called.  
That basically had been the worst, the call. Dean's father had kicked him out when he had found out that Dean was bisexual. Dean had been eighteen and was about to graduate. He had crashed at his uncle Bobby's for the last few months of school, hoping his father would accept him. But he had never done. He even had refused to come to Dean's graduation and also hadn't allowed Dean's little brother Sam to go. After his graduation Dean had been home a last time, to tell his father and his brother that he was leaving and moving to Boston. He just had wanted to say good bye to his brother, but John Winchester hadn't let him in. He had called Dean an abomination,told his son that he was sick and that he had not raised Dean to become a fag and that it was good Dean would leave.  
And now, after years, Dean's father had called him. Dean had thought he wanted to talk, apologize, saying he made a mistake and wanted Dean to come home. But no, John had asked him if he was still sick. Told Dean there were people that could help him come to his mind. He had told Dean, he was allowed to come home for Christmas if he agreed to “get help”. Dean of course had refused and had been to shocked to tell his father to go to hell, even though Dean would have loved to...or at least Cas would have loved to. Instead John had started yelling at Dean, telling him what a failure he was, what a major disappointment and that he would kill everything he touches. At some point Dean had finally managed to end the call, but he had heard enough to feel like shit.  
That had been yesterday. Dean had been distant all evening and just looked like was about to kill himself.

  
Dean has a low self-esteem. He has problems accepting that he is loved, Cas knows that. And sometimes Dean seems to forget how much he means to Cas, even though Cas just had confessed his love a week ago and hell he had asked Dean to move in with him.  
But well Cas can imagine why Dean sometimes doubt that he is loved. Everyone with such a backstory would.  
He is so in his thoughts that he jerks up for a second when a song suddenly starts playing. Cas is wondering why their alarm got off because it actually never does at the weekend.  
Dean starts shifting slightly next to him.  
“Morning.” he mumbles sleepy.  
“Morning, Dean.” Cas replies and once again presses a kiss on Dean's forehead.  
“Any idea why the alarm got off?” he suddenly asks Dean, who's face is basically buried in Cas' chest.  
“Brunch with Charlie.” he reminds Cas, “ cos we went seeing 'The Hobbit' without her”  
The clock radio is still playing. Cas likes the song and starts humming along. It's some pop love song and normally he is not really a fan of those but he likes this one.  
Dean is now hiding his face in the pillows, not making an effort to turn it off. He still doesn't look happy and Cas just feels sad. But he suddenly has an idea.  
He starts softly placing his lips on Dean's neck and slowly wanders down with his mouth.  
“What are you doing?” Dean asks his face still pressed into the bed.  
“Making you feel good.” Cas whispers his lips now on Dean's shoulders.  
And then he starts singing the lyrics of the song, praising Dean with them, his lips still on Dean's body.  
“Cas what are you...” Dean lifts his head and Cas uses his change and turns Dean on his back now kissing Dean's chest.  
“Cause of all me/loves all of you.” he hums against Dean's torso, but Dean looks not convinced. His eyes are filled with pain and confusion, so Cas continues singing.  
“Love your curves and all your edges,” his lips are wandering down Dean's body again, over his chest down to his abs, “all your perfect imperfections.” and Dean escapes a a soft whine. Cas softly ruffles through Dean's hair his lips never leaving his skin.  
When he looks up he can see tears glistening in Dean's eyes and as if the song was written for this exact moment Cas sings along “How many times do I have to tell you/even when you're crying you're beautiful too” only causing more tears running down Dean's cheeks.  
Cas pulls himself up and kisses them away his hands still softly stroking Dean's hair.  
“Please stop crying baby.” Cas has stopped singing because as beautiful the song might be he has to tell Dean with his own words, “Please stop. I love you very much Dean. And I'm happy to be with you.”  
“But I'm an abomination meant to fail. I kill everything I touch.” Dean whispers raspy. He looks deep in Cas eyes and Cas hates it that Dean seriously believes what he just said.  
“You are not. Your father is a horrible homophobic person who doesn't know you at all. Because you are everything for me and you are perfect the way you are. Dean, please believe me, you are worth so much and even though the world sucks and turns against you, I'm still here. Because you make me happy and I love you.” Cas says holding Dean's gaze trying to convince him, how much he is loved.  
“Thanks,” Dean mumbles quietly, “If we spend more time in bed we will be late and Charlie will get mad.”  
“You're probably right.” Cas admits but only leaves their bed reluctantly. He is totally aware that he will not magically help Dean getting over his issues by telling him how much he loves him. Cas knows that “I love you” will never fix anything, but maybe it will help. And maybe one day Dean will get over his horrible dad. Cas just had hopped he could cheer Dean up a bit.  
Honestly he doesn't want go to brunch with Charlie. He won't be able to hold Dean's hand, to kiss him, or just to tell him how cute he looks today, because Charlie doesn't know yet. It will feel exactly like hiding their relationship because of a homophobic parent (what is actually not quite true because Charlie is first of all gay herself and second of all ships the hell out of Dean and Cas, but they haven't made their relationship public yet).  
Cas has to sigh.  
But when they are both ready to go, Dean suddenly kisses Cas. It is a short and gentle kiss but the tender touch of Dean's lips is more than enough for Cas and when they part away Dean actually smiles at Cas and his smile is real.

 


End file.
